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Monday, 14 May 2012

Where I Am Coming From......

I thought today I would tell you a bit of my story and what has brought me to where I am today on my journey to a healthier fitter ME.

Growing up I never had a huge issue with weight, I wasn't one of those that could eat anything and not gain a pound.  I kept active enough that I didn't gain weight....then I had my first child and gained a whopping 65lbs...after my son was born I kept active and worked hard to shed the excess weight and got back to my pre-pregnacy weight.   I was happy with my body type and my weight. 

3 years later I became pregnant with my 2nd child and once again the weight piled on around 65lbs again.  This time I retained water like a sponge.  Needless to say I wasn't as active as far as exercising went, I was exhausted from chasing after 2 little ones....then 11 months later I was pregnant with my 3rd child.  I had lost some of what I had gained with my 2nd but not enough....you can see where this is going....gaining and gaining and more gaining. 

I wasn't eating proper meals the first form of sabotage, then I started eating emotionally as my hubby and I weren't the happiest couple around for a while.  Needless to say I let myself go for the last 23 years.  Our relationship improved but I still ate like life didn't matter.  I tried this diet and that diet, seen a few lbs here and there disappear only to show back up with friends. 

I tried Weight Watcher meetings but I didn't get anything from them. I didn't get any inspiration from the leader (maybe my mind wasn't in the right place)  I found that I was paying to go and weigh in, pick up the little brochure/recipe that they were giving away that week.  Then about a year later I tried it again...only to end up with the same fate. 

I tried all the different fad diets out there even the SouthBeach Diet - that one didn't last very long.  About 5 years ago I thought I would try Herbal Magic, thinking maybe this one would work, I left there with my head spinning....I crunched the numbers they gave me for the program, the supplements, concluded I would be broke before I even started.  They tried to convince me that we spent that much in junk food and eating out.....I think NOT.  We didn't even come close to the $700+/month for junk food and eating out...we bought Pizza once a week and it was only costing us $30 and we didn't eat out.  So then two years later I made a second visit to Herbal Magic, not to join but to get the information of the supplements then off to the health food store I went with the pages of information to try and find the same things.  I got most of the same things or close to them anyways.  So following Herbal Magic and the info from the Health Food Store I started journalling my food intake, water intake, taking the supplements I was off.  I quite drinking Pop - this was a big one for me; At one time I was drinking, (oh you'll just die when I tell you) 1.5 - 2+ litres of Pepsi a day......yep your eyes are not playing tricks on you. 

I was doing great from April 1, 2008 - June 8, 2008 I had lost 35lbs, I was under 200 lbs, I was thrilled.  Then out of no where my world crashed all around me and I mean crashed...My dad passed away suddenly the morning of June 8th.  It has taken me nearly 4 years to let go of the hurt from his passing and start living my life for me again.  I stayed in the past...I was living June 7, 2008 over and over because then I didn't have to face or accept my dear dad had left me and this world to be with my mom again after 42 years.  I got a big ole double whammy, for the first time I had to deal with the loss of my mom when I was 6 months old.  My hubby, bless his sole stuck by me not knowing what to say, hoping & praying I would pull out of deep dark place I was in.  I Did!!

Well here I am today and proud to say I live in the here and now.  I am moving forward, loving my life and the new me I am becoming with every step I make.   I have accepted my dad's passing and remember he will always be in my heart.


Corinne~

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