As we grow times change. As kids we are concerned about being outside playing with friends and have a good time. As we grow up our concerns to start to change, we start thinking about our first boyfriend or girlfriend and how nobody can know about our secret crush except for nearest and dearest friend. We see our teenage years approaching and start planning for high school, going out on Friday nights and getting our drivers licence. Before we know it we need to start thinking seriously about our future and what we want to do.
I remember as growing up at times it felt as if time stood still for others and I only aged or that time stood still for me and everyone around me aged.
Now I am faced with a new stage in my life and this is the care of an elderly parent and what my life will be like as I get older, as it is getting here faster than I would like. We like to think of our parents as indispensable but really they are not, no one is.
When my dad suffered a TIA (mini stroke) at the beginning of December I was so happy when he came home and was recovering well. Then a trip to the heart specialist and some more prescriptions we went on our way home to celebrate my son's 22nd birthday. Things seemed to be doing really well until for my dad sometime on Sunday. This is when the reaction he was having to a medication took a full hold on him and mimicked a stroke.
As it was my dad was weakened by the TIA and now is even weaker. The doctors are still optimistic that he will recover from everything but will take longer this time. The waiting for him regain his strength is the hardest part and trying not to take over is extremely hard, you just want to help but you have to let them still do things on their own so they can regain their strength. Watching a man that was completely independent and didn't like to rely on anyone for anything to have to rely on others is really hard. I am so proud that my dad is letting us help but it isn't easy as in his mind he still is capable but his body needs time to regain his strength.
For those that never have to watch their parents lives change so quickly and feel so helpless you are lucky as there are many of us that have to be there for our parents and take our turn to care for them like they did for us from birth all the way up into adulthood.
I took care of my father in law when he was diagnosed with terminal cancer, I helped my dad with his late wife Elsie when she had terminal cancer and now I am helping my dad. Many tell me that I have a Golden Halo waiting for me in Heaven, but I am not doing it for the halo but because of love and because of family for with out my family I wouldn't know love the way I do.
It is a scary thought when the day comes that you wonder if your parent will be able to return home or not. My dad is lucky he is able to come home not everyone is so fortunate.