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Friday, 8 June 2012

My Dad ~ My Inspiration

 Four years ago today in the early afternoon my world stopped as I knew it.  The morning started off great, coffee on the deck enjoying the morning listening to the birds sing, the butterflies on the lilac trees and all of the gifts our Lord has given us in nature.  In April of that year I started on a journey to a new me, I was changing my lifestyle, I was making healthy choices, I was loosing weight 35lbs from April 1, 2008 to June 8, 2008.


My hubby had ran into town to pick up some groceries he needed for work when a knock on my door happened around 2:10 pm...the knocked that started me to spiral out of control.  My cousin was at my door, he was the one with the task to tell me that my dad had passed away that morning.  I couldn't believe what I was hearing.  This can't be true, my dad is fine why are you so cruel is what was running through my mind in the few seconds that felt like minutes before it hit me that my dad was gone.  My youngest daughter was the only one at home with me at the time....we comforted each other but neither of us felt comfort.  My eldest my son was living in Saskatoon at the time, I couldn't phone him and tell him this news....I asked my cousin to make the call for me as I was shaking like a leaf about to drop off the tree.  Then I had to try and track my husband down in town...he was going to friends place to pick something up so I called he had left there....he wasn't answering his heart was breaking and I couldn't located the one person that was my rock.  What seemed like forever was probably about 30 - 45 minutes when my husband drove up and I told him what happened.

You see my dad and I were extremely close and I wasn't ready to say Good-Bye just yet.  I wanted more time to spend with him.  So after everything was over and I was trying to go back to living my life, I ended up living in the day before as I wasn't ready to accept what had happened to me and my family.  I told everyone I was fine but really I was far from it.  I reverted back to all my old habits in a short time, knowing that if I continued I would be like my dad and headed for an early grave because of heart disease.

Within 2 years I had gained back close everything I had lost but not more which was a good thing.  I kept on living a sedentary lifestyle, eating anything I wanted and not really thinking about the consequences.  When I would sit down and think about things I knew if I didn't make some changes in my life I would be heading for an early grave and I wanted to enjoy my life and time with my family.  So I went to the doctor in February told him I know I need to make some changes in my life, I need to loose weight, get in shape but before I start any of this I want to make sure I have his OK to do so in-case there were some health issues I needed to be aware of and work around.  I told him that I was planning on joining Weight Watcher's and was also planning to start getting some exercise.  I got the green light back from the doctor, every test came back in the normal range as well as encouragement to stick to my plan, that I could do this and it would help me out in the long run. 

Today I remember my dad with happy thoughts and wonderful memories.  I know he and my mom with my grandparents are watching me from Heaven cheering me on.  My dad has become an inspiration for me on my journey to a new me.  He is one of the reasons I think I am doing so well on this journey.  My dad helps keep me strong. 

Today I am 20 + pounds lighter and over 8.5 inches smaller than I was when I started my journey. 

Thank you dad for your inspiration and support.

I Believe......
       .....My dad is always with me!


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