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Saturday 28 June 2008

I Love You Dad

Since my last post so many things have changed in my life. Starting with the sudden passing of my dad on June 8th. I could hardly believe what I was hearing when my cousin came to tell me that my dad had passed away. One of my biggest fears had just came true. I wasn't ready for my dad to go, but are we ever ready to lose a loved one. Once I gathered myself, I had this tremendous feeling of peace come over me before I started to feel alone and lost in this world once more. My dad wasn't only my dad, he was my best friend. A day didn't go by that we didn't talk...I sure miss those conversations. Something will happen and I will say I have to remember to tell dad that when I call him.

My family has been awesome. My husband has helped me through this, we have leaned on each other every single day since. It still feels a bit like a dream but then I realize that I am not dreaming when I feel the tears well in my eyes.

With strength that I never knew I had helped me through the planning of the funeral, the phone calls that had to be made to family and friends. My faith helped me through this time as I know God and Jesus were with all the way and still are with me.

After my dad passed I prayed to God to let me know that my dad was safe in Heaven with my mom and that he was happy. The next morning I got the answer to my prayer when I phone my best friend in Flin Flon. Kim told me of the dream that she had of my dad on Sunday night, that he was in the most beautiful meadow you have seen. The wild flowers were absolutely breath taking and the smelt like non she has ever smelt before. My dad was walking hand in hand with a younger woman that Kim didn't recognize, they were laughing and talking and dad would stop to pick more flowers for this lady. Kim said he looked so happy. I asked him if this lady had dark hair and glasses which she said yes she did and she looked to be near 40 years old. I told Kim that was my mom that was with my dad. Kim told me after she arrived at our place that as my dad and this lady turned to walk back to where they came from with a basket full of flowers my dad stopped turned around and looked at her and told Kim, tell her I love her, then he smiled and winked as he walked away with my mom. Kim confirmed that it was my mom when she arrived on Wednesday when I showed her a picture of my mom. Kim's dream was the answer to my prayers.

Saying good bye to my dad was the hardest thing I had to do in a long time. I know we will meet again, I would have loved to have given him one more hug and told him once more that I loved him. That is one thing we always did was tell each love we loved them at the end of very visit or every phone conversation because you never know when the last time will be.

I am very grateful that my dad didn't suffer, he passed very quickly and painlessly and very peaceful.

Rest in Peace Dad, I Love You.

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